PSA

Melissa wrote an incredibly powerful Public Service Announcement a few days ago that you can find here.

I'm not sure I have the energy to write anything quite as thought provoking or raw and honest tonight. So, I will take a different tact. My thoughts are meant in no way to be in conflict with or undermining of Melissa's comments, but instead are in jest; a coping mechanism if you will indulge me.

A Public Service Announcement - To My Children

The Laundry Fairy is currently on sabbatical with an undetermined return date. Until such time as The Laundry Fairy is able to return to her duties, a substitute fairy will be standing in.

Please be aware that the following may occur:

1. The laundry may pile up - While the substitute fairy will try his hardest to keep up, there may be occasions that laundry may not be finished as quickly as you are accustomed. This may mean you may be required to wear more than your favorite three shirts and 2 pairs of socks.

2. The laundry may not be folded neatly - The substitute fairy has not had the level of practice nor has been blessed with the magical ability to fold clothing in the neat, clean and straight lines as you have experienced with The Laundry Fairy. As such, your clothes may not fit in your drawers quite as well. You may even have to resort to refolding your clothing when the substitute fairy has folded them in a manner not to your liking.

3. Putting the clothes away - The substitute fairy is working multiple jobs while The Laundry Fairy is away, so you may be asked to put your own clothes away in your drawers. While we understand this is an incredible inconvenience, they are, after all, your clothes. See related item #2 above.

4. Bleach - Owing to inexperience your whites may not be quite as bright or, alternatively, may smell like bleach, depending on if the substitute fairy has used too much or too little bleach. In light of these expected errors, we ask that you try not to spill as much stuff on your white clothing and, in alignment with our longstanding policy on the subject, we remind you that your shirt is not a napkin.

The above is not an all inclusive list of potential inconveniences, but represents the issue we expect to experience first. As other issues are identified, you will be alerted, likely by being told you will have to do something yourself or that your perfect outfit may have to be altered.

Also, please be aware that The Dishes Fairy, The Cleaning Fairy and The Taxi Fairy have accompanied The Laundry Fairy, and as such substitutes for these fairies are also being sought. We expect that substitutes for these fairies will also pose challenges and you may be asked (read instructed) to do things you are unaccustomed to. Our best advice to help you get through this difficult time is - get over it.

Thank you,

Fairy Management