Yesterday (Saturday) morning, Harper was having the best day since we were admitted and then diagnosed. She was awake, alert, and wanting to leave her room. We took a walk, ate in the family area and we really enjoyed ourselves, as much as we could
Yesterday afternoon, however, after the administration of her 3rd chemo drug, vincristine, she went back downhill. She complained of stomach pain, and nausea. Later, she complained heavily of her legs being "yucky", "icky" and "gucky." She couldn't sit still. She was up out of bed, back in bed, thrashing her legs, unable to get comfortable.
It was a very long night, and I actually got a very little bit of sleep, as she only wanted to cuddle up with her mom. Her mom had likely one of the rougher nights here.
I honestly likely didn't help matters a lot, as I struggled to keep my patience with the nursing staff. It seemed to me (whether I was right or wrong) that they weren't doing everything they could to address her discomfort, and at times were doing things, like trying to weigh her or take standard vitals, at extremely bad times, based upon Harper's obvious discomfort.
Melissa told me to just go home at one point, and I even snapped at her. That's when I realized it was probably me in the wrong (though I still believe they could do better on some points).
So, we're seeing signs of improvement, but the chemo IS taking its toll. I'm just hopeful the worst is behind us for this round.
Hang in there Tex...you're in for a rough ride. Kuddos to your patients. If you need to scream, press and hold the "A" button for as long as it takes . You'll feel better , and we'll understand.
ReplyDeleteTried to stop by today. Knocked on the door but no answer. I know there is nothing I can do but I just wanted to let you know that I care; my church and friends are praying for all of you.
ReplyDeleteLara Jones (from Humana)
Brian... you know as well as I do... being in the medical field can have its disadvantages at times like these... I can completely understand your frustration as I would likely be acting the same way. When it comes to your babies, the fight in you will be there and nothing anyone does will seem good enough if you are watching Harper in pain... you are doing well Dad... even if your fuse is short... it is a tough time and all you want is to see her be her... and that is completely understandable. Keep your chin up. Melissa won't hold it against ya for being short! My prayers are continually with you all.
ReplyDeleteBrian... you know as well as I do... being in the medical field can have its disadvantages at times like these... I can completely understand your frustration as I would likely be acting the same way. When it comes to your babies, the fight in you will be there and nothing anyone does will seem good enough if you are watching Harper in pain... you are doing well Dad... even if your fuse is short... it is a tough time and all you want is to see her be her... and that is completely understandable. Keep your chin up. Melissa won't hold it against ya for being short! My prayers are continually with you all.
ReplyDelete